log 6

weight: 313 (lost 2 pounds YAY!)
exercise: 30 minutes of misc. (need more)
written: 30 minutes (need more)

so...here we go again....

Been working slowly on the same story for 'Tales of Florentine' and writing was just like
doing a chore so i stopped and took a break. It gets like that sometimes and its Very annoying. I expect to write more soon.

work is the same: don't want to be there.
about the only bright spot are my friends there and one particular woman who I have knownfor a while but is recently catching my eye.
I always thought she was attractive because I look towards a woman's face first then
everything else. If I see a woman with a great body I HAVE to see her face and if she
has a face that I could live with then I'm interested.
This woman has Always had a pretty face
and a Great smile and laugh.
recently she made a point of telling me that she isn't dating anyone anymore.
I Rarely get chicks interested in me....well...wait....I can Never tell when a chick is
interested in me and I've missed out on some Fine women! But it seems like I can always
tell when a chick is Not interested in me which is most of the time.
SO i find myself struggling as to what to do next....
...i've started down a new path to loose weight, write and change my life for the Better
and I feel a relationship right now would add chaos...
...whenever I think a woman is interested in me I am ALWAYS Wrong(!)...
...the more i think about this the more i realize I'm just overreacting
like I always do with women
she just talks to me cause I'm her friend
'sigh'

finally, about two weeks ago my ma went into the hospital due to an irregular heart beat.
the symptoms she described are similar to the symptoms my step-father had before he
had his stroke. She was there for 2 days so they could monitor her then sent home.
My ma is going to be 80 next year and it never Seriously occurred to me that she could
'be sent to the glue factory' so soon. It seems like she has been always around and...
...i....just....don't really think about my ma Not being here...but I guess I should start...
...all part of getting older I guess...
OH! what's going on with my ma doesn't much to do with my decision to start the
Cotntail Venture...heh...if anything it makes me realize i need to stop thinking of myself
and realize that there are others out there who want me/my attention and who i want or
want to give my attention to.
OK
gonna try to go back to bed...that's All for Now, Space-Pals!
remember: Life is INsane. You're Not.